Wednesday, March 09, 2005


More on same-sex marriage

I went back and re-read my original post before writing this one, just to make sure I'm in relatively the same spot. I think I am.

I have thought a lot about this. Before I start, allow me to clarify this. If the government were to call a referendum tomorrow on the same-sex marriage issue, I would be at the voting booth first thing in the morning and I would vote against it. My reasons are moral, and here it is:

I believe the definition of marriage to be "one man and one woman, united under God, until death do you part". Therefore, marriage is, to me, a creation of God, blessed by Him, designed to last for the duration of the couple's life spans. Adam and Eve were instructed to go forth and fill the earth. God designed us physically so that a man and a woman are both required components for successful child birth. He also gave us the joy of sexual union so we would find the process enjoyable. He did not say anywhere in the Bible that pre-marital sex, cohabitation without marriage, adultery or homosexuality are acceptable and divorce could happen only under certain specific conditions. God also did not provide men carte blanche to beat their wives and God did not say that parents could simply refuse to honor their responsibilities. I also do not accept the idea that homosexuality is anything BUT a choice, since I do not believe that God has a sense of cruelty about him that he would wire men to desire men or women to desire women.

Based on this, I oppose same-sex marriage.


But those are MY beliefs. Ask my neighbor or a co-worker, you just might get a different answer. That is why the marriage definition will be changed. The government has come down saying that they are redefining civil unions. That's cool, as far as it goes. It's important to remember that, in our society, a government is not for the Christians, by the Christians. It is not for the homosexuals, by the homosexuals. It is not for Hamilton, by Hamilton (although things would be better if it was;-) ).

It is FOR THE PEOPLE, BY THE PEOPLE. Anyone with the ear of an MP or MPP can, if they make a successful case, get that politician to put forth a member's bill seeking a new law or changes to existing ones. Once it gets into debate and a vote, it is up to our elected officials to step up. We can express our pleasure and/or displeasure with them in a number of ways, most importantly by voting. If my MP votes for same-sex (and I already know Beth Phinney will), she has zero chance of getting my vote in the next election. The Conservatives could run someone who runs on a platform "How I hate the New York Yankees" on Hamilton Mountain and I'll vote for them. But it is not up to my MP to consider my moral position to be any stronger or more important than those who have sent letters in support of the issue.

If we really want to preserve true marriage, here's what those who claim to follow God need to do:

Seek a bill to separate marriage from civil unions. You wanna live common-law, marry in front of the justice o'the peace, marry within your sexual classification, knock yourself out. But you are NOT married, you are civilly joined. Marriage is for those who seek God's true meaning of the word.

Followers of God MUST go to work on healing their marriages. This can only be done by putting God first. A great deal of disillusionment about marriage and the ensuing erosion of the institution stems from the fact that those who claim to hold it most dear perform equally badly (or worse) at it than those who don't base their marriages on God.

God gave us an awesome gift when he created marriage. There is no earthly relationship that requires more energy, but the payback is phenomenal. We, however, surrender to the temptations of the world and allow our marriages to suffer, wither and die. The Meeting House has a great bit on marriage and I quote:

For instance, my wife and I might have a "tradition" that every Tuesday night we snuggle on the couch to eat popcorn and watch a movie. It can be a weekly routine that we enjoy and that contributes in its own little way to the intimacy of our marriage. But if we were to let other more important relational issues slide, rarely speaking to one another or prioritizing each other's desires and feelings, but still made a point of watching a movie and eating popcorn every Tuesday, whether we like it or not, it would soon become evident that this Tuesday night ritual is not helping us maintain a close marriage. In fact, it might actually be working against us, allowing us to "pretend" that everything between us is good without actually having to relate to each other in any meaningful way.

I think many Christians are, sadly, pretending. We need to be examples of how to have Godly marriages. We need to model those qualities so necessary in a successful marriage (patience, forgiveness, tolerance and love). If we live the example and reclaim the marriage banner as God had intended it to be, perhaps it would no longer be under the attack that we feel it is. There is no doubt that fundamental Christian beliefs are slowly being marginalized in the public eye and, as sad as that is, I think we have let ourselves in for it in so many ways.

If we want to see marriage restored, we (God's children) must lead the way so that future generations will learn from what went before. Only then can true repair happen.

It's late, I'm tired and I think I lost the thread toward the end. Comments are, as always, welcome.